Throughout my childhood, severe general and separation anxiety ruled my life. I didn’t understand that I have a Father in heaven who loves me unconditionally and works everything together for my good. All I knew was my parents, and I thought they were all I had. I battled daily with the fear that they were going to die suddenly and that I would be left alone and helpless.

Just before 9th grade I learned that Jesus loves me so much that he lived a perfect life as a man and died on a cross in my place, for my sins, and rose again so that by his grace I would be saved and have eternal life. I learned that Jesus is forever with me, working for my good. Because he loves me and will never leave me, even if my parents die, I’m never alone and will always be cared for. Miraculously, within days, all my anxieties began disappearing and I put my trust in God.

This is how I came to know Jesus Christ. During high school, this faith matured and grew with the help of community. I joined a Bible study and was mentored.

Two springs ago, the Lord blessed me, and I met a faithful, loving, and joyful girl named Jaime, and we began dating. He gave her to me so that I could love and care for her with the love that God gave me and so we could encourage each other to grow stronger in our personal relationships with the Lord. The single most important lesson I’ve learned is to surrender my future to the Lord. Jaime has a degenerative illness that brings terrible pain and harsh limitations to her daily life. I strongly believe in miracles and that through God anything is possible, but I also know that the Lord’s plan is mysterious and greater than my own. It’s hard to date and commit myself to a girl who’s possibly dying. Many people don’t get it. They would say that I’m wasting my time and should be setting up my future for something more permanent. At the beginning of our relationship this was terrifying for me, that this girl who I love may not live out a full life with me.

However, all of this was a blessing in disguise. With no way to set up a future for myself I was left with no other option than to surrender my future to the Lord and trust it to be in his hands working for his glory and my good. Nothing I’ve experienced has been more freeing than this surrender of my life to God. Giving up my future has allowed me to love and care for Jaime with a full heart and no regrets, and more importantly relinquish all control and worry and to focus on glorifying and loving the Lord with all I am.

— Drew Meininger, Baptized April 2019

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